Saturday, December 12, 2020

New Mutants: Or Why I Don't Write Movies for a Living

 Well the New Mutants movie finally got released this year, or should I say escaped?

I kid, but seriously if given a chance, how would I have ended the mutant saga?


We open at a reservation, caught in the grip of a horrible storm. Danielle Moonstar manages to survive, although her father doesn't. The official story is a freak tornado. Dani wakes up in a remote hospital. Dr. Cecilia Reyes greets her and generally acts as friendly as she can.

From there Dani is introduced to other wards:

Sam Guthrie: From Kentucky, a young coal miner who accidently caused an explosion that killed his coworkers and family.

Roberto de Costa: From Brazil, a dashing fellow who reveals he burned his girlfriend to death, although he's a bit cagey on the details of that.

Rahne Sinclair: Scottish werewolf. No, seriously, fur and fangs, the whole nine yards. 

The four seem to recall separately a fifth person, but that would just be silly. The teens act in therapy and around the hospital, which sometimes goes from warm and high tech to rundown and scary, more so when they get close to the basement. Dr. Reyes assures them there is nothing to fear. 

At least that's what she tells them. Reporting to the hospital's director, Cameron Hodge, she tells something different.

Seems ever since the Essex Corp. declared war on mutants and poisoned everything to prevent mutant births, there have been no mutants born since the whole X-23 massacre some years ago (flashback to Logan). Essex considered mutants a dead end and just about everything devoted to them has been mothballed...except for these five. Yes, five, as Xi'an Coy Manh was captured first, we just haven't seen her yet. 

Hodge is of 2 minds on this. One, new mutants means more and THIS time around they can control the narrative. Take their freak powers and use them as weapons or tools. Or they could just kill them. Hodge makes it clear he'd prefer the latter and unless Reyes has some damn impressive results soon she might be joining them in a lime pit. 

The façade soon cracks. Sam remembers his family as recently as last Christmas. If he crushed them in a mine, how could they celebrate? Roberto has some problems as well. How did he burn his girlfriend to death? He demonstrates super strength and can create updrafts, not fire. Plus who was his girlfriend? Seriously, he can recall burning her flesh but not her face? Or her name?

Rahne is still a werewolf though. 

Dani reveals that she can create things based on people's memories but she can't alter them. They decide to break into the basement and find Xi'an trapped inside a tube. Her power is controlling minds and memories. Dr. Reyes finds them and tells them the truth. 

Then Hodge shows up with armed goons. He makes it clear if the kids won't be lab rats they'll be dead lab rats. Rahne then turns into a werewolf and starts tearing through the Essex goons. Hodge freaks out and runs away, calling someone on a video phone. They are disappointed and some mercs are sent. 

More goons show up and Hodge rushes out to meets them. They all fall over dead and X-23 (now much older) steps out. Hodge has a complete breakdown and tries to shoot the kids. He dies and dies bad. X-23, or Wolverine as she introduces herself, gets the kids out. Dr. Reyes shows she has powers too (force fields, which is how she kept the kids from escaping) and joins in. 

They get in the mercs armored truck and head off into the sunset. 

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