Aroma of Troma Week: Class of Nuke 'Em High (1986)

 Class of Nuke 'Em High (1986) dir. Richard W. Haines/Michael Herz/Lloyd Kaufman, Troma Entertainment 

And so we end another feature here at Geekademia, at least for another year. We've seen comedy and horror in equal measure so why not end it with a nuclear powered teenage mutants of superhuman size and strength? Then I remembered I already did the Toxic Avenger so let's take a look at the silver medal of the Tromaverse. 

We open with sunny and pleasant Tromaville (presumably the same home to the aforementioned Toxic Avenger) and the Tromaville Nuclear Power Plant. It's safe, top of the line, and only leaks a tiny amount of radioactive runoff into the water supply. 

Lately though that has been harder to cover up, despite bossman Mr. Paley's (Pat Ryan, Jr.) best efforts. It becomes almost impossible when a nerd at the local high school takes a few sips from the water fountain and turns into a violent maniac before chucking himself through the nearest window and dissolving before a horrified crowd. 

None of this bothers Eddie (James Nugent Vernon) though. Nope, Eddie's biggest concern is getting his best friend Warren (Gil Branton) laid. Which should be fairly easy, given that he has a serious girlfriend, Chrissy (Janelle Brady). But both teens give him the whole 'wait until marriage shtick' so naturally he figures it is his sworn duty to help both uptight teens relax. So he gives them nuke laced pot, grown by the Cretins in the shadow of the plant. 

Who are the Cretins? They used to be the Tromaville High School Honor Society, now (thanks to the runoff) they are violent, degenerate, and also in control of the drug trade. 

But enough of them for now. Warren and Chrissy consummate their relationship at Eddie's party and everything's fine! Except that Chrissy is somehow six months pregnant, showing and rushing to the bathroom at cheerleader practice. She vomits up a thick black eel-like thing before passing out. 

Warren isn't doing too well either. He passes out before transforming into a lower budget version of the Hulk and killing two Cretins. They take that last one kind of personal and lay plans to take their problems out in one swoop and take over the school.

Oh, and Warren and Chrissy's baby? Yeah it's still there and it's getting bigger...

This is a film that knows exactly what it is and gives you everything it promises. You can't ask for much more than that.