Often Imitated, Never Duplicated-Superstars Profile#7

Captain Lou Albano
Real name: Louis Albano
Home: Carmel, NY
Membership: The Sicilians, the Orient Express, the Headshrinkers, the Moondogs, the Blackjacks, the Wild Samoans, the Machines, the British Bulldogs
A.K.A.: Leaping Lou Albano, the Captain
Finisher: Non' yer business

Background: Why's he called the Captain? Cuz he'll never steer you wrong!

Lou Albano was a guy with some breaks, good and bad. He tried to be a hero at first, really, but "Leaping Lou" failed to make the cut for the Superstars. He went the other way and became a pirate themed robber for a while before he started hiring himself out.

You see, Lou had ideas. Why sweat it off fighting guys in tights when he could tell them where to hit and get a cut of the profits?

Lou was good, darn good and soon the Northeast was equally cut between him, "Classy" Freddie Blassie, and the Grand Wizard. When McMahon Jr. came to power, Lou found himself thrust into the public eye. He also caught the eye of pop singer Cyndi Lauper. A feud kicked off but the public grew enamored of the rubber band wearing faster talker. He and Lauper settled things, after their proxies duked it out, but when Roddy Piper and "Cowboy" Bob Orton assaulted the Cap after an awards ceremony the public was fully on the captain's side.

Lou finally found himself on the Superstars team at last but mostly in an advisory position. He was quietly retired and dedicated himself to charity work for real. 

USSR Number 1-Superstars Profile#6

Nikolai Volkoff
Real name: Josip Peruzovic
Home: Moscow, USSR
Membership: Partners with the Iron Sheik, the Bolsheviks, the Million Dollar Corporation
A.K.A.: Boris Breznikoff, Executioner#3, Nickle & Dime Volkoff
Finisher: Bearhug

Background: With the US, Europe, and most Asian countries now engaged in a superhuman race, the USSR was no exception. Dozens of men (and some women) were created or forged through the 1960's and well up to the 90's.

Among the dozens was weightlifter Josip Peruzovic. Volunteering for the process, the young man found his strength tripled. His IQ was down about fifty points, but he wasn't it much anyway.

He was unleashed on the world but quickly threw in with "Classy" Freddie Blassie...mostly due to the few dollars he tossed the newly dubbed Nikolai Volkoff's way. In the Russian strong man, Blassie found a gent with inhuman strength and unwilling to question him. 

Partnering him up with the Iron Sheik, the two were his top enforcers but after a while Blassie sold his interest in Volkoff's contract to the infamous "doctor of style" Slick. In 1987, the Iron Sheik was brought to justice. Slick decided to add another Russian to the mix and partnered him with the not quite as infamous (or Russian) Boris Zhukov. The team stayed together for most of the 80's before Volkoff's programing went a bit off kilter and his love of all things Russian was replaced with all things American.

Volkoff decided to see the world, but he found himself broke. In stepped "Million Dollar Man" Ted DiBiase but that account is settled elsewhere.

Grab Them Cakes-Superstars Profile#5

Junkyard Dog
Real name: Sylvester Ritter
Home: Charlotte, NC
Membership: Superstars, partners with Tito Santana, Butch Reed
A.K.A.: Big Daddy Ritter, Stagger Lee, Leroy Rochester
Finisher: The Thump (powerslam)

Background: Ritter, despite his reputation for being the toughest and orneriest, was actually a pretty nice guy. He'd slam you through a table for suggesting it though.

His background was mostly in football, but he fell into the profession of bounty hunting. He was good too; it was said once Ritter was on your tail nothing could stop him. This morphed into him being tougher than a "junkyard dog" and the name stuck.

He worked mostly out of the Mid-South. He made headlines when he vowed to take down the infamous Fabulous Freebirds. They in turn vowed to blind him, which they did. The fight made him famous, but his recovery and the hauling in Freebird leader Michael PS Hayes after beating him in a chain match? Legendary

JYD made enemies too. When his partner Butch Reed betrayed him and left him for dead, a masked hero calling himself Stagger Lee started showing up. No one was able to prove JYD and Lee were one and the same, but JYD reappeared on the scene some time later and Lee was never seen again.

Word of his exploits soon reached up north and the Superstars soon had a new member. Operating on a bigger scale, JYD went after Adrian Adonis, Greg "the Hammer" Valentine and many others. He was good, too good, McMahon thought. Given his background, he might start looking too close into McMahon's business.

So he was fired in 1988. Nothing fancy, just a simple 'thank you for your service but the budget must be cut'. JYD didn't mind it and went back south to continue his career.

You Got the Moves Like Da' Sheik-Superstars Profile#4

The Iron Sheik
Real name: Khosrow Vaziri
Home: Tehran, Iran
Membership: Partners with Nikolai Volkoff, "Classy" Freddie Blassie
A.K.A.: Col. Mustafa
Finisher: Camel Clutch

Background: America wasn't the only country to want superheroes. Khosrow Vaziri, if asked, would have described himself as a patriot, which is why he volunteered to be the first of his country's superhuman army.

The result, a man with inhuman strength and the toughness of pure iron. Then things got a bit sticky and Vaziri found himself stuck in America in the late 70's. He mostly kept off the radar, but gang lord "Classy" Freddie Blassie found him and made him an offer he couldn't refuse-take out Bob Backlund.

The Iron Sheik, as the press called him, did just that in the heart of New York City. The Iron Sheik thought that would be it. Why wouldn't he? He just beat the leader of the Superstars...then some punk named Hogan showed up and forced him from the top of the mountain.

Blassie, however, made it up to him. McMahon Jr. was running Titian at that point, so the Iron Sheik was informed of the new way to do things. He didn't care for it, but the money was nice. He and Russian strongman Nikolai Volkoff were a decent pair but the Iron Sheik became too dented to go on. When his home country called and offered him a job, however, he grew interested. That tale would be continued in the 90's.

The 8th Wonder of the World-Superstars Profile#3

Andre the Giant
Real name: Andre Roussimoff
Home: Grenoble, French Alps
Membership: Superstars, Heenan Family, Mega Bucks, Colossal Connection
A.K.A.: Giant Machine, Jean Ferre, the Polish Giant, Monster Eiffel Tower
Finisher: Giant press

Background: The man, the myth, the legend. Andre was many things, hero and villain equally but he never did anything small.

Prior to the Superstars, Andre grew up in his native France. Too large for the army, he took to fighting to make money. He was good, unbeatable by most accounts, and that fact got him on Vince McMahon's Sr.'s radar. He as personally invited to join the Superstars, an offer he accepted.

Andre hit America and went right to the top. Indeed, it seemed only natural that he would take over the group but McMahon Sr. retired and soon Junior was running things. Oh, he saw Andre as amazing power, but more as a sidekick than a leader.

This annoyed the Frenchman, but he did the best to ignore it as Hulk Hogan earned more and more praise and respect. Things came to a boil around '87, when Andre fully joined the Heenan Family. He would spend the rest of the 80's as a villain before rejoining the Superstars briefly before retiring.

Hot Rod-Superstars Profile#2

Roddy Piper
Real name: Roderick Toombs
Home: Glasgow, Scotland
Membership: Partners with "Cowboy" Bob Orton, Superstars
A.K.A.: Masked Canadian, Super Scorpion
Finisher: Sleeper hold

Background: Some are destined for greatness, some have greatness thrust upon them...and some sit on the sidelines and snark.

Roderick Toombs grew up around the globe but always considered Scotland his home. Leaving at a young age, the youth found he had the gift of gab, specifically the ability to rile people up to commit violence, usually against him.

He was noticed by Mr. McMahon after watching his talk show Piper's Pit, where Piper introduced himself to the crowd by usually berating and/or attacking the guests. His bloody and brutal talk with Frank Williams got him on McMahon's radar, but his beating of "Superfly" Jimmy Snuka got him McMahon's attention.

Sure, Hulk Hogan had the public's attention but who could he fight? So Piper became the Hulkster's number 1 foe, yet the one guy the hero couldn't just beat up. At least not without charging admission.

Then something happened, namely he got popular. It was decided to switch Piper over to the side of the angels, or at least enough reign him enough not to lose any sponsors. He wasn't as popular as the 'Orange Hobgoblin' but he still managed to earn more than a few fans.

When the Hulkster left, Piper saw the writing on the wall and left with a highly rated farewell episode. He came back sporadically during the mid-90's.

Whatcha Going Do Brother?-Superstars Profile#1

Well, I said a while ago that I was going to do this, so why not now? Now, understand the following work was meant to represent an idealized version of the real life person and by no means an endorsement of the wrestler's views or condoning their actions in the real world. The following is based only on what happened in the ring, plus variations created for story telling effect.