Rewriting the Book: Bastion Booger

 Or, Good Lord Shaw, how bad did the bookers hate you?

So yeah, after Friar Ferguson bombed, the boys in the back figured out a sure fire character-an ugly fat guy! Who smells and picks his nose! Kids like gross stuff, right?

Yeah. Rather hard pressed to come up with a decent hook. No way is 'WWF World Heavyweight Champion Bastion Booger' ever being said. 

That being said, Shaw took the idea and by Gad, he ran with it. Duct tape to create a hump, a singlet that looked like it hadn't been washed since Billy Beer was on shelves (or maybe washed in said beer). His moves even made sense. So what was the problem?

The gimmick itself. What to do?

I'd give him a manager at least. Harvey Wippleman, who then tries to pass him off to ANYONE. Other managers, the guys he's fighting, random members of the audience...

Rather like the idea of Harvey desperately trying to unload Bastion, who ends up winning somehow thus Harvey HAS to keep him. 

Ok, so a comedy character. Maybe not a Wrestlemania headliner, but someone's got to job to the stars. 

 

Transformers/GI Joe III-Or Why I Don't Design Toys

 Bringing this back. Looks like the next big crossover was Kup/Triple T with Sgt. Slaughter and Leatherneck. The next set might be Hound/VAMP with Clutch. I figured Scarlet would be the figure, but I was close, right?

Merely guess, nothing serious meant.

Chop Shop/Torch (Dreadnok cycle)

Brawn/Short-Fuse (MMS Missile System)

Hot Rod/Snake-Eyes (Silver Mirage motorcycle)

Tracks/Steeler, Thunder (Slugger tank)

Mirage/Airborne (Falcon glider)

Perceptor/Doc (Forward Observer Unit)

Gears/Torpedo (SHARC)

Trailbreaker/Tripwire (VAMP Mk. II)

Shockwave/Hiss Driver (HISS)

Cliffjumper/Recondo (Armadillo)

Buzzsaw/Viper Pilot (Viper Attack Glider)

Bonecrusher/Firefly, Stinger driver (Stinger Jeep)

Sunstreaker/Mutt and Junkyard (LRV, recon sled)

WWE VS the World XVI

 A tradition is a hard thing to break, so once again, here's a little feature to kick the new year off proper. Rules are basic, just pick who you want to win, results here in two weeks. 

RAW VS AEW (Day 1)

With Joe Tessitore and Tony Schiavone from Madison Square Garden in New York City, NY

The War Raiders (Erik and Ivar) VS Private Party (Marq Quen and Isiah Kennedy)

Winner: War Raiders 1-0

WWE Speed Rules match (5 minute time limit)

Dragon Lee VS Daniel Garcia 

Winner: Dragon Lee 2-0

Iyo Skye VS Mercedes Mone 

Winner: Mercedes Mone 2-1

Trios match

Judgement Day (Finn Balor, "Dirty" Dominick Mysterio, and JD McDonagh) VS Death Riders (Pac, Claudio Castagnoli, and Wheeler Yuta)

Winner: Judgement Day 3-1

Liv Morgan VS Mariah May

Winner: Liv Morgan 4-1

Bron Breaker VS Konosuke Takeshita

Winner: Bron Breaker 5-1

NO DQ, Falls Count Anywhere match

Gunther VS Jon Moxley

Winner: Jon Moxley 5-2

Raw sweeps the board 

________________________

Smackdown VS New Japan (Day 2)

From the Tokyo Dome in Tokyo, Japan 

Michael Cole at your broadcast table 

LA Knight VS David Finlay 

Winner: LA Knight 1-0

Nia Jax VS Mayu Iwanti

Winner: Mayu Iwanti 1-1

Braun Strowman VS Shingo Takai 

Winner: Braun Strowman 2-1

Bianca Belair and Jade Cargill/Naomi VS Momo Wantanabe and Natsupoi

Winner: Wantanabe and Natsupoi 2-2

Apollo Crews and Austin Theory VS Intergalactic Jet Setters (Kevin Knight and Kushida)

Winner: Crews and Theory 3-2

Shinsuke Nakamura VS Douki

Winner: Douki 3-3

Six man tag team match

Alex Shelly, Chris Sabin, and Randy Orton VS Hiroshi Tanahashi, Toru Yano, and Oleg Boltin

Winner: Tanahashi, Yano, and Boltin 3-4

Luke Gallows VS Gabe Kidd 

Winner: Gabe Kidd 3-5

Chelsea Green VS Mercedes Mone 

Winner: Mercedes Mone 3-6

Jimmy Useo VS Ren Narita

Winner: Ren Narita 3-7

#DIY (Johnny Gargano and Tommaso Ciampa) VS West Coast Wrecking Crew (Royce Issacs and Jorel Nelson)

Winner: #DIY 4-7

WWE Speed rules match (5 minute time limit)

Candice LeRae VS Lady C

Winner: Lady C 4-8

Cody Rhodes VS Zack Sabre, Jr

Winner: Cody Rhodes 5-8

New Japan takes the lead in a repeat from last year. 

______________________________________________

NXT VS TNA (Day 3)

From the Palms Casino Resort in Paradise, NV

 Booker T and Matthew Rehwoldt at your broadcast table 

Dog Collar match

Lexis King VS PCO

Winner: Lexis King 1-0

Roxane Perez VS Masha Slamovich

Winner: Roxane Perez 2-0

Nikita Lyons and Cora Jade VS Spitfire (Jody Threat and Dani Luna)

Winner: Lyons and Jade 3-0

Table match 

Tony D'Angelo VS Moose

Winner: Moose 3-1

Fellon Hendry VS Xia Brookside 

Winner: Xia Brookside 3-2

Ladder and chair match

Nathan Frazier and Axiom VS The Hardys (Matt and Jeff Hardy)

Winner: Frazier and Axiom 4-2

Ladies Chair match

Shotzi VS Rosemary

Winner: Shotzi 5-2

Trick Williams VS Nic Nemeth

Winner: Treat Williams 6-2

And NXT blasts TNA off the board.

WWE wins 2-1 but New Japan is still holding steady